“Of course we try to beat ’em. …We have never tried to play and not win! You have to understand one thing — we’re playing the world famous Harlem Globetrotters!” --Red Klotz

Coach of the Globetrotters’ patsy, 85-year-old Red Klotz has had a few wins along the way

The Harlem Globetrotters have played in 117 countries. More than 12 million people have watched them live and in person. And the team has more than 21,500 wins — none of which would be worth a damn without a worthy foil, a team that would lose over and over again.

That team was the Washington Generals, rechristened now as the New York Generals. The coach of the Generals, Red Klotz, is the biggest loser of all time.

Today on a basketball court near the Jersey Shore, the elfin 85-year-old Generals owner who dreamed up and coached the team is very likely arching a perfect three-pointer over the arms of some startled younger player.

When the ball swishes through the net — as it so often does — Red will unleash one of his trademark smiles. And why not? Klotz has his health and a big house overlooking the beach, six children and a whole raft of grandchildren, a fat bank account, and a marriage that’s lasted more than six decades. Oh, and he’s still got a killer shot on the court.

“I play three times a week,” Red says. “Full court sometimes, but I’d rather play half court. I play with players that range in age from 17 to 40, I’m three times their ages, and they enjoy playing with me, because I play fundamental basketball. I’m not as old as you think I am, because I play ball. Some people are old when they’re young, and I’ve always believed that you can be young when you’re old.”

Says 53-year-old journalist Tim Kelly: “I’ve played some pickup ball with him and it’s amazing. He still chucks up the two-handed set shot and it’s like it’s guided by radar.”

Born in South Philly with the name Louis Herman Klotz, Red grew to be only 5-foot-7. His eyesight was terrible. His parents didn’t want him to play basketball. His two trademarks were his hair (guess what color) and his incredible shooting touch. He led his high school to two city championships and was named Philadelphia’s top player in both 1939 and 1940.

A scholarship to Villanova followed, but he was booted when the coaches found that he had married his wife, Gloria, during his freshman year. No matter. World War II was going on and Red served in the Signal Corps. After the war Red joined the South Philadelphia Hebrew Association, which was part of the American Basketball League – a predecessor of the NBA. Then, in the winter of 1947-48, he was recruited by the Baltimore Bullets, who won the NBA title that season with Red’s help.

Does this sound like the track record of a loser?

The Red Klotz story is worthy of a book. And since space here is short, let it suffice that in 1953 the owner of the Harlem Globetrotters offered Red a chance to develop his own team to travel with the Globetrotters and play them, whether it be in Terre Haute or Tokyo. The team was the Washington Generals, the straightman to the Globetrotters comedy act.

Red owned the Generals, he coached them and he played for decades on the floor. Game after game, the Generals tried in vain to beat the Globetrotters. Now take this with straight face, because the following statement has made Red a very wealthy and very happy man: “Of course we try to beat ’em. This is something that is misunderstood by sports writers. We have never tried to play and not win! You have to understand one thing — we’re playing the world famous Harlem Globetrotters!”

Red states this with such conviction that it’s hard not to believe the guy. But there is that one blemish to his nearly perfect losing streak, a single win against the Globetrotters that took place in a small gym in Martin, Tenn., in January 1971.

Red, of course, is the story’s star. He sank a long-range set shot in the final seconds to win the game. And how old was the world’s biggest loser that night?

A mere pup of 51.